I want to talk about psychology, don’t worry I am not going to go into some deep technical essay on the mind and how it works in this crazy world. I am more going to talk about my own mind and how frustrating it is. The enemy within, my procrastination!

It’s a hard one to work out. I have enjoyed writing since I was a child, but, I haven’t written a great deal. Instead, you will find notes and ideas scattered around that have come to nothing. At the same time, I will be professing that my dream is to be a published writer that can afford to write full time. I dream this and say I am working towards it but then the time that I have where I could further this dream is spent doing nothing of import.

I say I don’t have time, and yet my kids are grown and I work office hours for the most part. they are excuses, I want to change but I am not sure how to do it.

I could liken it to health and weight loss, I had some sessions talking to a phycologist once about weight loss, part of a scheme supposed to help people that need to lose weight. I could sit in those meetings and answer all of the questions on what I would need to do to lose weight. Exercise, eat more healthily, etc. Then I would leave the session and just continue on with my life as I had before. I know what I need to do, I just don’t have the will to do it.

This is the problem with my psychology, I know what I want to achieve, be it weight or writing dreams, but I plod on doing the bare minimum. while saying I am trying. I often wonder what will force me to change. With weight loss and fitness it could end up being something serious that kicks me into gear, even knowing that now it doesn’t push me to change. With writing it would be the realisation that I am not going to achieve anything if I don’t start putting in the work.

I love this video, I watch it and get inspired, then it fades. Maybe I should watch this for the first 12 minutes of my day. Keep that motivation alive. I may try that, see if it helps.

I also have my Kanban boards that I have set up, they are already helping. seeing the tasks I need to do and moving them through the process.

I am more optimistic than I have been in a while.

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